Lent is always a strange time of year.
People left, right and centre are giving something up, hoping that they can see it through for the seemingly never - ending five or so weeks. Though I'm proud of myself for the week that I've survived without Facebook (!), I can't help thinking that my sacrifices are totally insignificant compared to Jesus' sacrifice for all of us. What's made me think recently is the ways that He limited Himself so much so that we would understand more of God and His kingdom. The craziness is that God still values our small, trivial sacrifices and I am so excited to celebrate (and this will sound cliched and kinda cheesy) the greatest ever love story over the next few weeks.
Over the last few months, there has been only one word that has grabbed my attention and challenged me to the core. Everything. In the first few weeks of our current module, this word disturbed me and shook me up because, deep down, I have known for ages that God hasn't had everything. My life as a Christian has always been so up and down- there have been times where everything is good and I'm spending time with God and trusting Him and there have been times where I just can't bring myself to spend time with God and have chosen to go my own way. This has happened for ages and for so long, I've known that this isn't what it means to live as a Christian. But how do I change?
Whilst everything can sometimes be one of the hardest words to think about in terms of relationship with God, sometimes, it's also the most freeing. When every part of your life belongs to Him, you can give Him the things you struggle with most and know that He is in control and that you have a choice to acknowledge that truth and surrender stuff to Him. What's more, you can give Him your future, knowing that He has perfect plans for your life. Harder, however, is realising that giving Him everything means re -thinking some of the stuff that's in your life and even letting go of it and choosing a new way. These are things that I'm thinking about and wrestling with at the moment - I'm nowhere near everything but I know this is a journey I'm on and I reckon it's gonna take a while.
The last few days have been difficult in terms of time with God. There's something in me that knows that I need to spend time with Him but I just can't be still or bring myself into that place to meet with God. To be honest, I'm feeling kind of numb and it's been times like these where I get lukewarm about faith and often get frustrated and go off on my own. This time, though I'm feeling so different. Sure, I don't understand this but I guess that's where everything comes in right? I'm choosing to give it to Him and trust that He gets it and will continue doing good work in me despite how I feel. (Phillipians 1:6)
Much love always,
Rhi xx
P.S. - American word of the post (because you totes need to be exposed to the awesome vocabulary used by Jords and Aspyn)
Presh - short for precious!
Example: Jordyn and Lucy are really presh
Love it!
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